Funny story

My aunt was telling me that there was a woman at her church who thought that vegetables that grew in the dark were of the devil because the Bible says that God is light and all that.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Why don't you use electricity?
A: Um... I'm using electricity right now... or else I wouldn't be able to answer this question!

Q: Name some LDS music artists.
A: That's not technically a question, but there's The Aquabats, Lindsey Stirling, The Killers, and Jenny Phillips! We're really sorry about Jenny Phillips.

Q: Do you all write romance novels about vampires?
A: Hey! Don't judge us because one Mormon wrote Twilight!

Q: Why don't you have a boyfriend?
A: Because Gerard Way is already taken.

Q: Why don't you drink alcohol?
A: Because I'm a minor.

Q: Why don't you swear?
A: I effing do! (Actually, I don't. I just wanted to say that.)

Q: Why do you hate gay people?
A: I don't! What gives you that dumb idea?

Q: Aren't you morally against loud music?
A: No, but there are some people in the church who are.

Q: Do you think carrots are of the devil?
A: No, but there was one idiot who thought that.

If any of you like The Cure...

I was having an interview with the bishop, and I said that I was addicted to The Cure's album, Pornography. Yeah, that was a bad idea.

Chivalry at its finest

(Credit goes to my brother for coming up with this idea.)