My favorite scriptures

Warning: This post contains some swearing, but it's all in the scriptures, so it's okay. Right?

• 1 Kings 21:21 (Look it up)
• Alma 52:28-29, 36 "And now behold, when the chief captains of the Lamanites had beheld Lehi with his army coming against them, they fled in much confusion, lest perhaps they should not obtain the city Mulek before Lehi should overtake them; for they were wearied because of their march, and the men of Lehi were fresh. Now the Lamanites did not know that Moroni had been in their rear with his army; and all they feared was Lehi and his men. ...  And Lehi pressed upon their rear with such fury with his strong men, that the Lamanites in the rear delivered up their weapons of war; and the remainder of them, being much confused, knew not whither to go or to strike."
• Ether 1:7 "Coriantor was the son of Moron."
• Exodus 20:17 "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s."
• Mosiah 12:5 "Yea, and I will cause that they shall have burdens lashed upon their backs; and they shall be driven before like a dumb ass."
• Also, all the scriptures that have hidden emoticons. Like John 2:9 "When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine, and knew not whence it was: (but the servants which drew the water knew;) the governor of the feast called the bridegroom,"
• All the verses in Exodus about shittum wood.