Q: The Word of Wisdom teaches that tea, coffee, alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs are unhealthy. Marijuana is legal in my state. Does that mean the Word of Wisdom allows the use of recreational marijuana?
A: Unfortunately, no. But it will be allowed once marijuana is legal in every state.
Q: I know we shouldn't watch pornography, but is it okay to read pornography?
A: *Facepalm*
Q: I take that as a no.
A: Exactly. Now go burn every copy you can find of Fifty Shades of Grey. Even copies that don't belong to you. Replace them with pamphlets about healthy relationships. NOW.
Q: This is getting awkward. Can we change the subject?
A: Sure.
Q: Does smoking count as breaking the fast?
A: Regardless, you shouldn't be smoking.
Q: Why do people use the term "sacred powers of procreation?"
A: Because they're too prude to say "sex." Next thing we know, they'll talk about the Israelites being delivered out of unusual behavior...
Author's note: Aside from the advice to burn copies of Fifty Shades of Grey that belong to other people, I was actually making a point about something very serious. Although the LDS church teaches that we shouldn't have premarital sex, it is important to know that the most serious problems with pornography are about exploitation and unhealthy messages about consent.
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